It's go time

it is 3:51am, and i cant sleep. partly bc ive got my days and nights mixed up, but also bc its Chemo Day. At 8:30 this morning, ill see Dr R ab my labs, then if all is well, head over to the infusion center for my first round of treatment. Round, right, bc this is a fight. my sister will drive me there and pick me up, might even sit w me for a bit. and that will be most welcome, but the fact is, im on my own in this. no husband to hold my hand when the drugs go in, to share funny memes and videos to make me laugh. to get me ice or water or another blanket or snacks or ANYTHING bc hes gone. and im here. ab to sit in a chair and poison myself in an effort to live. bc i have a son, whom i love, and who needs his mama. so i will fight, with everything in me, for him. bc he is our legacy to the world. and he is a treasure, and worth everything this disease and its treatment throw at me. so lets go. lets go kick cancers ass! Jeremiah 29:11